Learning to Ask—and Receive: A Child’s Lessons in Trusting God
The first experiences with faith can set the tone for a child’s whole life. At least this has been my experience. I hope it has been yours too. The question then becomes, what do we do going forward as a result of those early formative times?
My Introduction to Prayer
My family attended church throughout my childhood. I have to admit though that I don’t remember a whole lot about my earliest experiences with church. I remember graham crackers and toys (those would be from my times in the church’s nursery), and I remember flannel board stories and learning to sing.
I’m sure there were lessons taught by my teachers, but I have no conscious memory of them. What I do remember is kneeling by the side of my bed with my mother at the end of the day. And I remember a large, framed embroidery piece that had the words of a prayer. Perhaps you are familiar with it. The words were (as best I can recall):
Now I lay me down to sleep.
I pray Thee, Lord, my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray Thee, Lord, my soul to take.
If I should live for other days,
I pray Thee, Lord, to guide my ways.
Amen.
As I look at those words now, staring back at me from my computer screen, I realize how truly powerful they are and what they really mean. But back then, they were simply pretty cross-stitched crewelwork on a large piece of linen, and an example of prayer.
I’m guessing that for many of you, the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13) was your first example of prayer. And for some of you, perhaps it was a different prayer.
Regardless of what that first example was, hopefully prayer has become a meaningful part of your life. And if it hasn’t yet, it is never too late to start.
My parents taught us that we were to always pray at night before going to bed. They also made sure we had prayer over each meal we ate together. These early prayers let me know that I could talk to my Heavenly Father. I could talk to Him about my day. I could ask for blessings for other people I loved. I could thank Him for my own blessings and the things that made me happy. And I could ask for what I needed. Those simple childhood prayers also helped me begin to understand who I was as His child—a truth I explore more deeply in my post, Why I’m Happy: God’s Plan for Me.
I don’t recall how I also learned I could talk to Him in prayer over my problems, but the earliest two specific prayers in my life both had this in common. At both of those times, I had a problem. I needed help. And somehow, I knew if I prayed over my problem, He would hear me.
Praying at the Pulpit
As a little girl of about three years old, I remember stepping up onto a wooden stool and resting my hands on a child-size pulpit. It was to be the first time I ever publicly spoke in church.
I don’t remember the topic. I don’t remember any of the specifics. But my mother has repeatedly shared with me and others the piece of that day that surprised her more than anything.
Most little children, when given this opportunity, have someone to help them. They speak softly, repeating the words of the adult who is assisting. They are very concerned about doing something for the first time and tend to be shy about it.
For some reason, however, my thoughts were not about being embarrassed to stand up in front of the other children and the adults. They were also not about trying to remember what I had practiced saying.
“You got up to the pulpit,” my mother said, “and you looked out over the children. They were being noisy and not paying attention. And that bothered you. You wanted to make sure they were listening. So, you folded your arms, bowed your head, and began praying. You prayed that the children would be quiet so that they could hear your talk.”
Although I don’t remember that prayer, it sounds like something I would do. Even now, as an adult, I find myself praying before speaking in public that what I have prepared will touch someone’s heart and make a difference for them. And I think this all stems back to that earliest experience with a child-size pulpit and a room full of talkative children.
Praying about the Rain
The first specific prayer I do remember happened when I was about five. My family lived in Southern California, and we had a swing set in the backyard with candy-striped poles for legs, a slide, some swings, and a glider with two seats. How I loved to play on that swing set!
This particular day, I played inside during the morning. Then came lunch. And after lunch, it was nap time. (I hated nap time, but it was essential that it happen for my mother’s sanity.)
Because I had been inside all day, I was really looking forward to when nap time was over so that I could play outside on the swing set. Before reluctantly going to my room after lunch, I told my mother that after my nap I wanted to go outside.
She was standing at the sink. At my words she looked up and out of the window. Then she said, “I don’t think so. Not today. It’s raining.”
Her words crushed me. But just for a moment.
I turned and went out of the kitchen and down the hall to my bedroom. I closed the door and stood by the side of my bed for a moment. Then instead of climbing up onto the bed, I knelt down beside it.
I can remember this prayer like it was yesterday. “Heavenly Father,” I began. “I need your help. I want to play outside but it is raining. Please could you stop the rain? You are the one who makes the rain, and I really need to play outside today. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.”
After that simple and straightforward prayer, I climbed up on the bed, took off my shoes, and laid down. I looked out the window at the gray sky, smiled, knowing the rain was going to stop, and then closed my eyes.
It was about an hour later that I awoke from my nap. I looked up expectantly at the window. The sun was shining and the gray clouds were gone!
I quickly put on my shoes and then ran to the kitchen. “I get to play outside!” I announced. My mother turned and reminded me that it was raining, and there would be no playing outside today.
“But it’s not raining!” I insisted. “Heavenly Father stopped the rain so I can play!”
My mother turned back toward the window and saw for herself the sunlight streaming in. She had been so absorbed in her work that she hadn’t noticed.
“Well then,” she said, “Go along and play . . .”
Heavenly Father Wants to Bless Us
Since making Loaves and Fishes: Seeing the Miracles available, many people have asked me how to develop faith.
There are a lot of scriptures about faith, and they are worth reading and pondering over. But for me, it all comes back more to trusting than anything else. My first two experiences showed me that if I asked, He would answer. And going forward, I trusted He would continue to answer.
Why does He answer? I think in part it is because He loves it when we ask. But Jesus gave us an insight in the Sermon on the Mount that allows us to put ourselves in our Heavenly Father’s shoes. Consider these words . . .
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said,
“ . . . what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone?
Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?
If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?” (Matthew 7:9-12)
Take just a moment and consider with me what it might have been like for Heavenly Father to look down upon that little group of unruly children at church. Put yourself in His shoes. He’s hoping—you’re hoping—they will have a good experience that day. That they will learn something.
Then suddenly, a little girl in a frilly dress with a pixie haircut climbs up onto a stool and places her hands neatly on the children’s pulpit. She is about to give her first talk in church. And He knows this little girl will one day be someone who stands before people speaking, and who will write prolifically. She’s only three right now, but in her childlike way she asks for help. She asks for help. She asks for the children to be quiet so they can hear her little message.
What would you do? I think you would open the ears of the children and help them notice that instead of giving a talk, she is praying. She is praying for them to listen.
And what would doing that show that little girl? It would show her that you are there. That you care about her. That you are listening to her prayer, and you feel her message is important too.
Now, imagine that little girl has grown up a little. This time, you look down and you see her kneeling by the side of her bed. She wants to play outside. In fact, she is telling you she needs to play outside. Are you smiling? I think I would be.
And now listen to the words she is saying, “Please could you stop the rain? You are the one who makes the rain.”
Her simple testimony of who you are and what you can do touches your heart. This is the same little girl who will one day pray for rain to water her garden when she can’t afford to pay the water bill. It’s the same little girl who will one day pray for rain to stop so that an outdoor photo shoot can happen. And it’s the same little girl who will pray that in the fierceness of the tornadic storm that she can outrun the approaching funnel.
If you stop the rain this time, what will you show that little girl? Once again, you will show her that you are there, listening to her. That you care about what she needs. And that you can indeed temper the elements if it is expedient.
And that lesson will serve her going forward.
When the Answer is No
Now I know that Heavenly Father doesn’t always answer, “Yes, my child,” when we ask. Sometimes it isn’t expedient for us to receive what we are requesting. Sometimes His plan for us – which is always aimed at helping us grow and learn – requires something different.
Divine timing is important I have learned. And I don’t always know what that divine timing will be. The question isn’t “Does the Lord not love me?” Nor is it “Doesn’t He care?” Rather it is a question of, “Can I trust Him to know what is best?” And it is also a question of, “Will I continue to ask in faith going forward?”
Learning to trust God’s wisdom instead of relying on my own has been one of the greatest lessons of my life. I share another important step in that journey in The Day Lucy Finally Grew Up and Let Jesus Do His Job: A Lesson on Setting Boundaries.
He does love us. More than we can possibly understand. He looks down and He sees the questions we have, the prayers we are praying. And I believe He answers yes to every possible request we make that is in harmony with His plans for us.
Just like in the little prayer I had hanging on my wall, He wants me to trust that “If I should live for other days” that He will indeed “guide my ways.” And if the answer today is “No, my child,” it just might be “Yes, my child,” tomorrow.
Your Sister in Christ,
